Tag Archives: Stubborn

I’ve fallen, but I’m lighter than a washer

A few years ago, one of our idiot dogs (all of dogs are idiot dogs) peed on the floor. As I walked down a darkened hallway, I felt my foot going out from under me. I slid, cursed, avoided doing the splits, and managed to land on my knees, with most of the weight on the non-surgically reconstructed one. I was in pee, but I was fine.

Why is that important? It shows I’m not a SuperKlutz.

Here’s what happened today.

We had a new washer delivered, and paid extra to have the old one shipped away. While the crew was wrangling the old one out of the utility room, they spilled some of the residual water out.

Now, these guys deliver washers all day long, so they’re probably used to having a bit of water on the floor. Given time, they would have cleaned it up – in fact, they asked for a towel. A towel? Heaven forbid!

SuperKlutz to the rescue! She tried to vacuum up wet dog hair with a hand vac, and then realized there was more water than she thought. She got the mop, walked the 37 inches to the beginning of the puddle, and … slipped and fell on her knee. She tried to break her fall (and failed) with the hand that had been operated on … yesterday.

So, now she has a bandaged hand (with stitches), two shoulders being rehabbed, and a knee with a gouge in it.

How can I slip on an unknown puddle of pee in the middle of the night, and she can’t walk past a known spill that she is attempting to clean? She is a SuperKlutz.

Next time, give the nice man a towel and get out of the way.

The guys delivering the washer helped her get back on her feet. Actually, they just picked her up. They even counted down, like when they picked up the washer.

I suppose I should have tipped them, but how? It didn’t take long for them to raise her. Is there a one-time fee? Tip by the pound?

She has to see her shoulder surgeon on Friday. Luckily, he does knees, as well.

It’s Itchy

Virginia had a huge cast on her leg after her Achilles surgery. It was to keep everything in place for the early stages of healing, before moving on to the boot.

There’s really only one rule with a cast: Don’t stick anything in it. I’ve never actually worn a cast (just a bandage when I had knee surgery – update 2020: now I have), because I’m not a SuperKlutz, but I’ve heard they can be itchy.

Here’s the one rule again. Don’t stick anything in it.

Some people ignore this and scratch the itch. This can crumple the bandages under the cast which is bad, apparently.

Virginia would be some people.

I found her happily sticking a pencil in her cast to scratch away.

Really. There was just one rule.

So, we went back to the doctor and his PA took the whole thing off and redid it. He gave me the stink eye the whole time. Hey, buddy, you try to make her follow rules.

Virginia was happy because she got a new color cast. She didn’t like the first color she chose.

I Just Need A Couple of Items

Shoulder surgery is a big deal. You’re in a brace, you can’t use it for weeks, it needs physical therapy when the healing is done.

There’s really only three words at the beginning of recovery: Don’t Use It.

So, this is partially my fault, because I picked an inconvenient time to have a Vertigo attack that a couple of doctors thought might be a stroke. When they let me out of the hospital after keeping me overnight, the therapist mentioned to Virginia that she should not be driving in a brace as it’s a liability issue.

So, she took the brace off.

I needed some medication, so she decided to go pick it up. Since she was out, she decided to pick up a few things at the store.

This with her recently repaired arm out of the sling.

Her physical therapist was amazed by the change in motion when I took her for therapy. No, not amazed. Horrified.

The doctor said she hadn’t actually reinjured it, but to knock it off.

I’ll Take Out The Trash

So, our power went out, because it’s Dallas, and we lost all of the food in our deep freeze. Lots of slowly defrosting foods.

Virginia decided to let everything refreeze and toss it closer to trash pickup day, which made sense, because it’s hot in Texas and we have rats, raccoons and Lord knows what else around the neighborhood.

The day before trash pickup, she started loading up the trash bags. I told her to wait until I got home from work, and I would do it. Being a normal person, I was going to roll the trash can up to the freezer and load it up.

She couldn’t wait.

So, she ruptured her bicep tendon and a bunch of other stuff in her shoulder.

Later, she finally had surgery to repair it, and managed to strain her other shoulder during the healing period.

Then, she strained her back trying to survive with two partial arms.